Teaching Kids to Respect Others—And Themselves
Dennis Forleo How martial arts helps children grow in honor, humility, and self-worth
As a parent, you work hard to raise children who are kind, considerate, and respectful. You want your child to treat others with decency, listen to authority, and show courtesy—even when it’s not easy. But let’s be honest: in a culture that often glorifies rudeness and rewards sarcasm, teaching respect can feel like swimming upstream.
Here at Shepherd-Warrior Martial Arts, we believe respect isn’t old-fashioned—it’s essential. It’s the foundation of healthy relationships, personal responsibility, and lasting confidence. And the best part? Respect can be taught—and learned—through the time-tested discipline of martial arts.
Respect: The First Lesson on the Mat
Before a child ever throws a punch or breaks a board, they learn something even more powerful: how to salute.
In martial arts, saluting (sometimes the term “bowing” is used) is a sign of mutual respect. Students salute the instructor. Instructors salute the students. Everyone salutes toward the flag. Training partners salute each other before sparring or practicing together. It’s not about who’s better or stronger—it’s about respecting and valuing the other person.
From that very first class, children begin to understand that respect is part of the culture. It’s woven into every movement, every command, and every interaction. They learn to say “yes, sir” and “yes, ma’am.” They wait quietly for their turn. They help newer students. And they treat every person—regardless of rank—with dignity.
As these small habits are practiced repeatedly, something begins to happen. Respect stops being something that’s enforced—and starts becoming something that’s lived.
The Christian View of Respect
The Bible speaks often and clearly about honoring others.
“Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.” —Romans 12:10
“Honor your father and mother…” —Ephesians 6:2
“Show proper respect to everyone…” —1 Peter 2:17
Respect isn’t just politeness—it’s a heart posture rooted in humility and love. In God’s Kingdom, we are taught to consider others as more important than ourselves (Philippians 2:3). Respect begins with recognizing that every person is made in the image of God and has intrinsic worth.
Jesus made it very clear in what we popularly call the “Golden Rule”:
“Treat others the way you would want them to treat you.” – Matthew 7:12
This kind of respect doesn’t come naturally to children—but it can be developed through intentional training. In our martial arts program, we connect physical discipline to spiritual truth. When a student listens the first time or helps a classmate with a difficult technique, we celebrate not just their skill, but their character.
Respect for Others Begins with Respect for Self
One of the beautiful things about martial arts is that it doesn’t just teach outward respect—it teaches inward respect as well.
Many children today struggle with low self-esteem. They doubt their worth. They compare themselves to others. They feel insecure in their bodies, their abilities, or their personalities. But when a child begins to succeed in martial arts—when they learn a new move, break a board, or advance to the next belt—they begin to see themselves differently.
They realize: “I am capable. I am strong. I can do this.”
Additionally, they receive lessons that teach them that they are, “fearfully and wonderfully made” and that God created them and loves them. This gives them a sense of where their worth comes from and helps them combat much of the negative messaging that our culture pushes.
That sense of self-respect naturally spills over into their relationships. Children who respect themselves are less likely to bully others—and less likely to allow themselves to be bullied. They walk taller, speak clearer, and treat others with the same dignity they now believe they deserve themselves.
Noah’s Story: Earning Respect the Right Way
Noah was 10 years old when his parents brought him to our school. He had been having a hard time at school—not because he was failing, but because he was acting out. His teachers described him as “disruptive and defiant.” At home, Noah often talked back, refused chores, and struggled with authority.
The first few weeks were rocky. He rolled his eyes at the rules. He didn’t like saluting to instructors or being corrected. But we didn’t back down. We enforced boundaries with kindness and consistency.
And then something clicked.
Noah started earning praise for helping other students tie their belts. He volunteered to demonstrate a technique. He began responding to instructions with a “Yes, sir.” A few months later, his mom pulled us aside and said, “I don’t know what you’re doing in there, but it’s working. Noah just asked if he could help clean the dinner table—and he did it with a smile.”
Noah didn’t just learn martial arts. He learned to respect others—and himself.
What Respect Looks Like in Real Life
So what does respect-in-action look like for your child?
Here are some common behaviors that parents and teachers report after kids have spent time in martial arts training:
✅ Better manners – “Please,” “thank you,” “excuse me,” and other courtesies start flowing naturally.
✅ Improved listening – Children begin responding to directions the first time.
✅ Less backtalk – Tone improves. Children are more thoughtful in how they respond.
✅ Deeper empathy – Kids notice when others are hurt, left out, or struggling—and they step in to help.
✅ Increased responsibility – Students take pride in caring for their uniforms, gear, and personal space.
✅ Healthier sibling interactions – Respect and patience extend into relationships with brothers and sisters.
Respect doesn’t need to be lectured into a child—it can be trained into them with time, practice, example, and patience.
Respect Isn’t Weakness—It’s Strength in Action
One of the biggest misconceptions about respect is that it means being passive or timid. But in martial arts, respect and strength go hand in hand.
Our students learn to stand up for themselves without aggression. They learn to speak up without disrespect. They learn that real strength is quiet, controlled, and compassionate.
When a child becomes truly confident, they don’t need to belittle others to feel big. They don’t need to win every argument or prove their worth. Instead, they learn the powerful balance of humility and courage.
We call that the Shepherd-Warrior spirit—strong enough to fight, wise enough to know when not to.
The Long-Term Impact of Learning Respect
Teaching children to respect others isn’t just about improving manners—it’s about preparing them for life.
Kids who grow up with a respect mindset are more likely to:
- Do better in school (because they listen and cooperate)
- Build stronger friendships (because they’re kind and empathetic)
- Become leaders (because people trust and admire them)
- Avoid trouble (because they understand boundaries and consequences)
- Live a life that honors God (because respect is a biblical command)
And here’s the best part: they also gain peace. Because when children learn to treat others well, they build relationships that bless—not burden—them.
What You Can Do as a Parent
Even if your child isn’t in martial arts yet, you can begin reinforcing these lessons at home:
- Model respectful speech, even when frustrated
- Praise your child when they show respect
- Set consistent boundaries and hold them with love
- Read Scripture together about humility and honor
- Give your child meaningful responsibilities
And of course, if you’re looking for a community that will reinforce those values every week—through physical movement, character training, and biblical truths—we’re here for you.
Ready to See Respect in Action?
At Shepherd-Warrior Martial Arts, we believe your child can learn to show respect—not just when it’s easy, but when it matters most. We train with excellence, encourage with love, and challenge students to grow in character and confidence.
📞 Schedule your child’s Orientation class today!
🌐 www.shepherdwarriormartialarts.com/start-learning-martial-arts
📍 Located in Billings, MT
We’d be honored to help your child grow into a young warrior who walks in respect, purpose, and Christ-like strength.
Recent Posts
